Friday, January 2, 2015

The Taking of Deborah Logan - 2014


Symptoms of Alzheimer's Disease:

Memory Loss and forgetfulness 
Loss of reasoning abilities
Unable to read and write
Lack of time and chronological sense
Inability to make decisions
Depression
Anxiety
Social Withdrawal
Mood Swings
Distrust
Irate and aggressive behavior
Changes in sleeping habits
Wandering
Delusions
Loss of inhibitions

I recall my temporary Post-Graduate days. I went to Graduate School for one year for Social Work. For my field placement, I had to intern at a Senior Center. I will never forget the eerie uncontrollable fear that inhabited me the minute I would step foot in there. Everybody around me was aging, sick, showing signs of Dementia, Alzheimer's, etc. They all had one thing in common: they were all on their last leg. The Senior Center, where they engaged in fun activities for elderly people, was their final attempt at feeling alive. But then they would be transported to the very same place they would all go to die. It was scary. Oh my God, it was one of the most traumatic things I have ever experienced. Death was all around me. When I am older, then I too will have these fears that my mind and body will age and slowly but surely die. But at that precise moment, I was faced head on with it. Anxiety and fear incapacitated me and I just wanted to get out and see signs of life. I am not sure but I think I remember running to the bathroom and frantically texting my best friend at the time. I thought I was losing my mind and going crazy. I was losing control of my emotions as though something was trying to possess me...

Like Deborah Logan, an Alzheimer's patient and a study for a thesis documentary project, the symptoms she exuded were that and beyond what Clinical Professionals can comprehend. 

(The Taking of Deborah Logan)

Needless to say, I did not end up completing my Post Graduate Studies. I did not pass my Field Placement, but in lieu of an "F", I was told to just take a leave of absence to take care of my "issues". I never went back to Graduate School again. It was never my calling in life. I never have to experience it again..